I found this article PDF interesting with the history as well as the different cultures view points of breastfeeding.

In reading the book Baby Matters  I understand a little more of my own culture I see how we are influenced by marketing from Formula company’s as well as our culture becoming more needful of our perceived ‘own time’.

What is in the PDF
When should weaning from Mother’s milk occur?
When are we naturally intended to begin weaning?

When is our natural final weaning?

How have humans weaned through the millennia?

What do the “experts” say?

What does the research show?

If we read this quote from the World Health Organisation site
“….Breastfeeding is an unequalled way of providing ideal food for the healthy growth and development of infants; it is also an integral part of the reproductive process with important implications for the health of mothers. As a global public health recommendation, infants should be exclusively breastfed(1) for the first six months of life to achieve optimal growth, development and health(2). Thereafter, to meet their evolving nutritional requirements, infants should receive nutritionally adequate and safe complementary foods while breastfeeding continues for up to two years of age or beyond. Exclusive breastfeeding from birth is possible except for a few medical conditions, and unrestricted exclusive breastfeeding results in ample milk production….”

I found both the book and the PDF very interesting as well as the recommendation’s from the World Health Organisation…which I would also like to note that the WHO writes for everyone and the last bit of the quote is written for our western culture which is affected by the ‘lack of milk’ syndrome.

A century of experts has destroyed unity on parenting

“…Poor modern-day parents. No wonder so many are confused and defensive about their child-rearing skills. At this point hardly any universally reliable, useful advice still persists on the parenting landscape. To whom can you turn for good counsel?…”

This is a really good article which sums up many issues I have over the historical ideas of raising children.

Children need love and we as parents need to be able to be free to give it to them. Some of us may not feel that good at doing so as we have past issues with our own up bringing. 

I have been very interested in PND and feel that there is a lot more to this than just feeling down. 

Robin Grille is a great writer and I’ve read a few of his articles…I’ve not got his book yet but its on the list. Robin talks in this article about the need for on going support and also the historical aspects of raising children.

“… A new baby powerfully evokes from our unconscious memory a plethora of feelings, both positive and negative, that we felt when we ourselves were infants. Though a mother may not suspect it, her baby’s cries could be triggering her own painful memories of infancy. If a mother has unresolved pain about loss or abandonment, this pain may re-emerge when she enters motherhood – though she may have no idea why she is crying. Women who had difficulties with attachment to their own mothers, who feel their mothers were not caring enough, or that their fathers were overprotective, are more likely to suffer from PND…”

If you feel like having a bit of a rattle around in some history check out this web page

Attachment Research

This site looks into many areas that John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth devoted their life too. These people (plus many others) have studied about children and their development…the why’s, the how’s and the who’s.

Looking into their research will give you a good start to understanding some of the reasons why your children act they way they do or the behaviour they exhibit with possible retaliation to their parents actions. 

Mary Ainsworth (an American developmental psychologist known for her work in early emotional attachment) has done many studies a few years ago on different parenting styles and what the outcomes are.

Check out my other blog to view a little short video

“….Characteristics of Secure Attachment
Children who are securely attached do not experience significant distress when separated from caregivers. When frightened, these children will seek comfort from the parent or caregiver. Contact initiated by a parent is readily accepted by securely attached children and they greet the return of a parent with positive behavior. While these children do not become exceptionally distressed by a parent’s absence, they clearly prefer parents to strangers.

Parents of securely attached children tend to play more with their children. Additionally, these parents react more quickly to their children’s needs and are generally more responsive to their children than the parents of insecurely attached children. Studies have shown that securely attached children are more empathetic during later stages of childhood.
These children are also described as less disruptive, less aggressive, and more mature than children with ambivalent or avoidant attachment styles.

As adults, those who are securely attached tend to have trusting, long-term relationships. Other key characteristics of securely attached individuals include having high self-esteem, enjoying intimate relationships, seeking out social support, and an ability to share feelings with other people….”

Which one are you? And which one would you like your child to be? 

The development of “Cry It Out” and the trend in infant care was to use detachment methods to encourage early independence of babies. For some reason this method of treating babies this way still seems to be in fashion even though there is mounting evedence that this era should of been left in the past.

Click to see full link

“…Dr. Benjamin Spock was parented under Holt’s methods: “Spock was the oldest of six children. His quiet, self-effacing father was a lawyer. But it was his mother, the beautiful, intelligent, and coldly puritanical Mildred Stoughton, who most shaped his life. He described her as a ‘very moralistic, excessively controlling’ woman who habitually grilled her offspring about their potentially vile daydreams and deeds. Many of this imperious woman’s ideas of motherhood sprang from a book, Dr. Luther Emmett Holt’s The Care and Feeding of Children, which identified well-being with proper diet; a zealous disciple, Mrs. Spock banned ‘dangerous’ foods, like bananas, from her house, and also insisted her children spend the night — both summer and winter — outdoors on the sleeping-porch. Under such strictures, young Ben grew shy and insecure…..”

It is important to read the links in this post as well to get the ideas right